Ten Reasons Not to Use Polyjuice Potion
by Inextricable
Summary: Ron and Pansy are to be married in a year. But what does that have to do with Hermione and Draco? Everything. One night both of them are on their mission and it ends up biting them both in the ass. Rated M for mature themes.
1. 1 This Body's Revolting

_Ten Reasons Not to Use Polyjuice Potion_

**Chapter one: 1. This Body Is Revolting! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, &the main idea behind this fan fiction belongs to Zarroc, I am just bringing it to life (or words) for her )**

Hermione paced the kitchen at number twelve Grimmauld Place. They had gone through the plan thousands of times, but she was still looking for any possible thing that could have been overlooked. Alas, everything seemed to be in order.

Once she went back to Hogwarts, she would become none other than Pansy Parkinson once a week and go into the Slytherin common room. Finally, Ron had agreed to accept Pansy's hand in marriage on a low-key basis. They were to marry in a year (after everyone had finished school).

As far as the order knew, the only people to know of this were Pansy's parents, Pansy, Draco, and the high circle of the Order. This as of now included The Golden Trio, Remus, Tonks, Mr. and Mrs. Weasely and Professor McGonagall.

Mrs. Weasely detested this plan just as much as Ron and Hermione did. Or at least, Ron let on that he didn't like it. He refused to admit that he had been smitten with Pansy since before Hogwarts. Beings both were pureblooded, they often bumped into each other and at one point both went to the same magic daycare. Since Ron's mother had noticed he wasn't showing much magical capability, she thought being around other children like him would break it out of him. And Pansy's parents just had more important things to do then looking after their daughter.

Pansy's parents, Pansy and Draco went seeking the Order for help. Pansy was being threatened to use as a servant because she couldn't do as the Dark Lord had wanted her to do. After several meetings, and hundreds of arguments, the four had moved into the headquarters along with Hermione and Remus.

The Parkinson's and Draco refused to give out any information they knew about the Dark Lords plans, as Harry had figured they would. That was why this whole blasted idea was made up, and why Hermione was completely tense all the time.

It was difficult to believe that tomorrow they would all be headed back to Hogwarts for their final year, well all but Harry that is. He had decided he was going to search for horcrux's on his own. He didn't want to endanger Ron's family by taking him to search, and Hermione had to go to school for this plan to work. They had planned it so that Ron would come back to the Headquarters for Christmas, and give the others news of everything Hermione had found out. They would in turn, let Harry know of their findings through Luna's father.

Everything was completely planned out, and fool proof. Or at least, everyone hoped it was.

Hermione sighed and sat down in her usual chair in the library. Pulling a book off the table, she looked up to see Draco. She smiled and flipped through the pages. It seemed to be a book about ancient artifacts of the house of Black.

Over the past couple of months Hermione and Draco had become friendly with one another. Certainly not something they would continue at Hogwarts (at least not in public) but it was still there. With Pansy and Ron having to try to spend as much time together as possible, Draco needed someone to talk to. He surprised himself by finding Hermione mildly interesting to talk to.

There was never a boring conversation. Whether it being them arguing about which potion would be more effective for unconsciousness, or laughing about how Divination was a complete waste of time and brain usage. Of course, there were moments when Hermione had thrown a book at him promising to hex him to oblivion after her slipped up and called her a Mudblood for thinking house elves should be freed.

"You know…." Draco said suddenly snapped Hermione from her thoughts. "Tomorrow we go back. How come you're not studying for the test in Potions?" he mused.

Hermione jumped quickly and went to dash up to her room with Draco following her. "WHY on Earth didn't you remind me sooner Draco! I don't even remember Slughorn mentioning it. Oh my, I'm so dead. I haven't had proper time to read over everything! Oh no!" She shuffled through her papers with homework instructions on it. She flipped through the last page and turned around with anger periling through her eyes. Draco took this as his sign to run for it.

They ran down the stairs with Hermione shrieking about him being a stupid ferret. Draco merely laughed, knowing he had gotten her good.

Ron and Pansy peeked through a door to see the two teens zoom past them. The engaged couple looked at each other with questioning looks before shrugging it off and going back to the room. They had gotten used to Draco and Hermione practically flirting daily.

After running down the stairs, around the library, through the dining room, and into the kitchen, Hermione stopped and placed her hands on her knees, breathing deeply and giggling. "Fine, you win this time Malfoy." She breathed.

Draco smirked and leaned against the counter. "Don't I always win?" he asked without needing an answer. It was true, he did usually outrun her. Quidditch put him into great shape, so running around the house or their playful wrestling matches were easy wins for him.

Hermione opened her mouth to comment on how her intelligence would out –do him any day when they heard two sets of footsteps come into the room. Draco looked over Hermione's should and immediately placed a smug look on his face. "Now Mudblood, if we are done here, I would much rather be packing for tomorrow. Actually I would rather be doing anything besides be near the likes of you." He drawled and pushed past her.

Hermione didn't even need to ask why he had changed so suddenly. She had grown used to his instant changes. They always happened when an adult walked in the room. Of course he wanted to protect his reputation. And heaven forbid anyone find out they were friends. So they acted like they hated each other unless alone.

She rolled her eyes and brushed past Pansy's parents. Hermione needed to pack as well.

As soon as she reached her bedroom on the second floor, Hermione sighed. This year was going to be completely different. And she wasn't sure she was going to like it at all. Harry wouldn't be there, Ron would be spending most of his time with Pansy. She was also Head Girl now, which meant no seeing Ginny other than at meals or free times.

No, this year wasn't going to be very fun. Having to be Pansy once a week didn't make matters much better either.

Hermione closed her trunk with a loud "thunk" and climbed into her bed waiting to go back to beloved school.

The next day the four students rushed onto the train, Hermione and Draco leaving the new couple to go to their own compartment. Hermione rushed to the Heads Compartment, while Draco went to find Crabbe and Goyle.

As soon as Hermione arrived, she noticed a boy sitting reading a rather large book. And for Hermione to call it large, it most definitely was an enormous book. The boy looked up briefly upon hearing the door slide open and smiled up at Hermione.

Terry Boot, a Ravenclaw. Hermione should have known. He was the second best student of their year. Of course, he didn't compare to Hermione because he didn't take nearly as many courses as she did.

"I knew you'd get Head Girl of course. I don't expect Hogwarts has seen a more intelligent student in their time, other than Dumbledore of course!" he announced cheerfully. Hermione blushed as she usually did when people admired her wits. "My parents nearly died of happiness when I got my badge! Said my family never had a Head Boy before!"

Hermione took her seat across from him, beaming with happiness for her fellow classmate. "That's great Terry! I can't wait to work with you this year." He grinned once more at her and her smile faltered.

"Something on your mind?" he asked.

"Hmn?" she looked up at him. "Oh, it's nothing. Just, it's really our last year. Time passed by so quick." She replied. Terry nodded and went back to his book.

Soon enough the train pulled into the outskirts of Hogsmeade. Hermione and Terry rushed to get out first and make sure that the first years made it safely to Hagrid. Several looked at the two teens with pleading eyes, being afraid of Hagrid's large appearance. But the two promised that he was extremely nice and wouldn't do anything to harm them.

Once everyone was situated, they caught the last carriage up to the school. Hermione glanced at the ten other empty carriages. She hadn't noticed so many other students didn't come back this year. It made sense though. Several parents were skeptical about sending their children back to school in the middle of a war when Voldemort could and most likely would take the school over.

"So, err… Terry…" Hermione started, breaking the silence. But not knowing exactly what to ask.

"Hmn?" he looked up at her.

Hermione bit her lower lip trying to think of something quickly. "You, uhh… Still with Hannah?" She asked.

Terry looked over at the glimmering lake sadly. "No, she said she didn't want to date anyone until this war was over. To be quite honest… It was probably just an excuse to break up with me. We didn't really talk much. Since we only had potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts together. She always decided to take the extra courses that my idea of profession won't work with. I want to be a Healer by the way." He stated.

"Oh, sorry to hear that." She said sympathetically. He only nodded and stood as the carriage came to a stop.

Terry helped Hermione out of the carriage before talked again. "So how about you, with Ron yet? Or still with that block head Krum, no offence if you are or anything." Hermione only sighed.

"Neither really. I suppose it would be better to be single this year. With N.E.W.T.s, graduation, the war…" she trailed off "I only have to worry about myself now. Since all of my friends have a loved one to worry about. Not that I won't be worried when Harry goes off to kill Voldemort or anything." She laughed.

Terry laughed along with her and left her at the Gryffindor table to head to his own.

As usual, Hermione sat with Ron and Ginny who both smiled up at her when she joined them. The sorting took place, with only 20 new students joining. Three joined the Gryffindor table, eight joined Slytherin, four joined Hufflepuff, and the last five went to Ravenclaw. The large number of new Slytherin students was expected by Ron, Hermione and Ginny.

All of the Death Eaters children were ordered to come to the school again. Henceforth, the Slytherin table looked just as full as it did every year, much unlike the other three tables that had dwindling amounts of students the past two years.

Soon enough, all the students were in bed ready for the next day, the first day of school. Hermione and Terry were in their Heads Dorms, which shared a common room and a bathroom. It was nothing spectacular. Cherry wood floors, coffee table, a beige couch, two matching arm chairs, hanging (candlelit) lamps, and a blazing fireplace.

Their individual rooms were decked out in house colors so they could feel more at home at Hogwarts. They each had a wall made of bookshelves, crammed with books of their preference. On another wall were their queen-sized four poster beds and bed side tables with draws. Another held a shelving unit to hold their classes' materials, and a desk. The last wall, being their closets with built in draws for things they couldn't hang.

The bathroom was much like the Prefect bathroom, only the tub was much smaller, and there were only two mirrors and two sinks.

Hermione was one of the few students not asleep yet. Instead, she was browsing the books in her room. As the Headmistress had suspected, Hermione was absolutely ecstatic upon seeing the large amount of books in her room. Now she wouldn't have to go to the library nearly as much to get information she needed.

She took a deep breath, and let out a sigh as she laid in her bed thinking about tomorrow. It would be her last first day of school. It excited, and scared the crap out of her all at the same time. She wanted to go on and work for the Ministry and be able to work with new situations every day. But then again, Hogwarts was her home now. After school was over, she wouldn't have a family to go back to. Before she went to stay at the Headquarters, she charmed her parents to forget her and think they were a happy couple about to move to Austria. She even made them think they were named completely different. In the end, it would be the safest, and best for them. But it still hurt.

Tomorrow she would start her mission. Turning into Pansy and talking to Draco. They had it all planned out so far. Ron was going to take Pansy on a nighttime stroll, pre-approved with the Headmistress. Pansy wasn't to tell Draco, which wasn't a problem since Draco sheltered himself from everyone anymore. Hermione would take the potion and slip into the Slytherin Common room. Simple as that.

The next day went smoothly, only Hermione was noticing she was being forced to partner with Terry quite a bit. Which she didn't really mind, but she missed her best friends.

Soon enough it came dinner time and Hermione and Ron were whispering intensively about the plans to make sure they both had everything covered. In two hours, Ron was going to meet Pansy in the Great Hall and take her outside.

Two hours came all too quickly for Hermione whom was pacing in her room. She had a set of Pansy's Slytherin uniform that she had snagged while Pansy was living at the Headquarters too. Looking at her watch, Hermione decided to stuff the uniform into her bag quickly. She grabbed a large wooden box on her bedside table and tapped it three times with her wand.

In the box were several vials of Polyjuice Potion that Hermione would need for the next few months. She took one of the vials out and looked at it with disgust. Hopefully it wouldn't taste as repulsive as the last one she had taken did. She tossed that into her bag as well and ran out of her room, heading to Moaning Myrtles bathroom. It was the only place she could think that she could safely change into Pansy and know her belongings would be safe. Since no one particularly enjoyed Myrtle's presence.

Once Hermione reached the bathroom she noticed Myrtle and said a quick hello before going into a stall.

Myrtle chose to ignore Hermione, which she was thankful for.

As soon as she came out, she looked in the mirror to see Pansy. "God my body is revolting." She exclaimed as she scrunched her nose up to her reflection. But nevertheless, she went to Slytherin room to see Draco alone in the common room. "Hey Draco!" she said in a tone she often heard Pansy use towards him.

He looked up at her and smirked, God how that smirk annoyed her. _But it looks good on him…NO wait no, it doesn't because he doesn't look good at all!_ "Hello Pans, how can I serve you tonight?" and with that Hermione spent half an hour seeing just how far she could push him before he would start to get suspicious of something. She then excused herself to use the lavatories.

Hermione reached the second floor bathrooms just in time. She knew she wouldn't really find out any useful information tonight. But at least she knew that Draco hadn't suspected anything. Or if he did, he was hiding it quite well. Either way, next week she would be going back to actually try to find something out. Even if it was something small, it could still be useful.

But for some reason, Hermione wanted to go back now. She shook her head, deciding she only missed his company. That was it, just his company. Nothing more, and nothing less.

A/N: So tell me what you guys think! I'm really not sure about this chapter, I had writers block like every 3 paragraphs. So it might go all over the place. And as I said before, the main plot of this story (the Polyjuice potion, Pansy&Ron, and a couple more surprises) were thought up by Zarroc!

And as you can probably tell, it will be ten chapters long. I hope you all enjoy! ♥


	2. 2 Awkward Takes a Whole New Level

**Disclaimer: Ok, this is going to be for ALL the rest of the nine chapters. I do not, and never will own Harry Potter, check the book covers, that amazing lady happens to own it all. Lucky woman she is. **

**2. ****Awkward Takes a Whole New Level**

Five weeks had passed since Hermione's first time in Pansy's shoes. Every chance she had gotten, she went to see Draco (as Pansy of course). Every time, she would report exactly what happened to Harry, whom in return would give any valuable information to the Order. It was a long agonizing task for Hermione, especially with making study charts for her NEWTs, but she couldn't let anyone down.

Her next planned time to see Draco was in two days. She couldn't help but be extremely nervous. That night would have to be the one where she would ask if he heard any news about Voldemort's upcoming plans for them. It was a crucial question, and would have to be asked just right.

Of course that wasn't the only thing that worried Hermione. Draco had seemed to come about kissing her whenever they were alone. Hermione would occasionally give in, but then tell him she had a boyfriend to be loyal to. That he shouldn't make her disgrace the name of Parkinson by cheating on her pureblooded boyfriend. He would nod and mutter sorry then they would go about talking again.

Most times, their conversations would be simple. About their views on things, or on people at times. Hermione found it extremely difficult to pull off hating most of the Gryffindor's. Not to mention, occasionally being flirty and airheaded. But for whatever reason, it made Hermione have a happy feeling in her stomach. Having Draco look at her like an equal, someone he could be near and not have to insult every two seconds. It was refreshing to say the least.

Hermione sighed as she came out of her thoughts. How was she supposed to write a decent essay with everything flowing through her mind? She had to at least read the same paragraph five times, absorbing nothing. It was completely unlike her to be so unfocused. Just because of Draco Malfoy no less!

The freakishly book-worm-like girl had only ever once been this distracted. Each time Ron and she would be in an argument. Fighting happened quite often between the two until their fifth year. It was foolish really, in Hermione's opinion. Ron always expected to be her first priority, and was often disappointed. But he never thought to pay Hermione the attention she needed, and quite honestly… deserved.

Hermione plopped her head in her arms that were folded delicately over her half written essay. Her frizzy brown curls flew madly around her before landing angelically in a bushy mess. The end of their fighting was all on her. From her silly childhood mistakes, even though fifteen wasn't too long ago.

Hermione did want to be more experienced for Ron, but not _that_ expirenced. Krum was obviously the perfect example of why not to date older guys, they won't listen to no. What started a small make out session turned into a powder blue dress being lifted slowly, earning a knee in Krum's groin. That pretty much ended any possibilities of being with him for awhile.

After being with Krum Ron has become so insufferable she had lost interest in him. This annoyed Ron more than ever of course. He blamed it all on Krum turning Hermione against him. When in reality, 

Hermione grew up and couldn't wait for Ron to do the same. So he ended up with someone with nearly as much intellect as him; Lavender Brown. For some reason, they seemed to be the happiest couple in Hogwarts for awhile. They didn't bother to suck face in more decent areas, simply keeping it as public as humanly possible. This only furthered Hermione's disgust towards the boy.

Somehow they still remained good friends, and weren't sour to each other, both having moved on. Of course, Hermione had only moved on to completely focusing on the tasks at hand. Malfoy, NEWTs, War. Anything besides that was unnecessary and considered a distraction.

But wasn't she already distracted by nothing at all?

Hermione let out a huge groan and banged her head repeatedly on the library table, gaining several eyes stabbing through her bush-like hair. Madam Prince came over and tapped her foot impatiently, causing Hermione to raise her head slowly in dread.

Hermione looked up at the librarian, embarrassment etched across her face, along with a small pout. "Sorry, I just became stuck on a variable of using Asphodel Root instead of Billywig Stings. It won't happen again I swear!" She exclaimed in a hurried but hushed voice, hoping to slide by the vulture-like woman's library-abusing radar.

Madam Prince's lips were in a thin line, her eyes scanning Hermione's fear-stricken face looking for any reason to kick her out. Taking a deep breath she gave Hermione an answer. "Fine, you can stay. But disturb these students again, and you will have to have friends come find books for you. And you might want to try a book not about History of Rebellious Goblins next time." Her voice pierced the air around her before she turned on her heel and began searching through the aisles looking for rule-breaking students. Sometimes Hermione wondered if her and Filch had a thing going, instantly causing a spasm and vile taste in her mouth. Seeing those two being romantic, let alone with each other, was a disturbing thought.

After two more hours, and skipping dinner, Hermione was finally done with her essay on The Great Goblin Rebellion. She sighed happily as she put the last of her things in her bag. All of her homework was officially done, which left their four day weekend wide open for relaxation and time for reading the large book she checked out from the library earlier that week.

It was really lucky for the seventh years. They were given a four day weekend this year for preparation of the Halloween Masquerade Ball that was to be held that Saturday. Thursday and Friday were set aside for the seventh years to go to Hogsmeade and pick out their outfits. Hermione had planned on going after Ginny and Luna's last lesson on Friday to get their dresses and accessories. Luna was going with Neville, and Hermione was inviting Ginny that way she wouldn't be alone for the night.

Slinging her overloaded-knapsack over her shoulder, Hermione trudged out of the library. She soon went off into her dream land again, imagining what would happen Friday night during her encounter with Draco.

After a few moments of travelling sub-consciously, Hermione was dragged from her day dreams by ramming into a tall figure that caused her to fall backwards and drop her bag. Contents of her bag scuttled all over the hallway, which Hermione hurriedly began to scramble to get everything back into her bag without looking to see what she bumped into.

"Wow Granger, if it weren't for your book smarts, you really would be a waste of a human being. If being as dirty-blooded as yourself could even be considered human." His smirk was nearly audible. Hermione simply rolled her eyes and continued to place the last of her things back into the bag. "Oh come on mudblood. I know we agreed to never talk in school again, but we both know you miss me." He drawled.

As Hermione stood up she glared at Malfoy. Why was he talking to her now? How could she talk to him with pure hatred now that she spent the summer being nearly friends with him? Not only that, but being flirty and friendly with him as Pansy. It was just too weird talking to him like this now. "I'm just not in the mood to deal with your pathetic attempts at lowering my self-esteem right now. So if you don't mind, I'll be leaving now." Hermione said as she started to walk up stairs towards Gryffindor tower.

Of course, half way up the stair case, Draco had caught up to her and jumped in front of her. Which almost caused Hermione to fall backwards once again, but luckily, she grabbed the railing to the stairs. As soon as she regained her composure, she sent daggers through her glare at Draco. He merely smirked at her which only infuriated her further. "Well you see I do mind you leaving. Who else am I supposed to torment tonight? All the scared little first and second years have gone to bed, the third and fourth years are boring, and fifth and sixth years are all too busy. Yet here's my favorite target, standing right in front of me, with no real reason to leave. Unless of course, you've suddenly decided to lower… or rather someone else has lowered themselves enough to date you." Draco scoffed at his own joke and leaned cockily against the railing.

Hermione took a deep breath to calm herself as she un-clenched her fists that were locked solidly against her sides. "Ugh, I liked you better this summer…" she mumbled under her breath as she looked anywhere but in his face. The face she had become so familiar with this summer. She could practically tell you exactly which hairs fell out of place and brushed against his eyes every day. Not like she actually wanted to pay attention to that of course. _'URGH! Why am I still thinking about him?'_ she cursed herself internally.

"What was that Granger? Did I hear you confess to liking me finally?" he gasped dramatically bringing his hands up to his mouth, mocking his shock to her. "It's about time you confessed your undying love for me! Too bad for you, I'd never lower myself to such dirt as you." He spat as he purposely knocked into her side whilst taking his leave. "Oh wait—Pansy said to make sure that Ron met her tonight at their usual place. Where ever that is." He stated as he inspected his nails. "Think you can manage to pass that along Granger? I can't really be bothered to go all the way upstairs for such tedious things." Before waiting for an answer he continued down a corridor leaving Hermione at the staircase.

Slowly the tired girl walked up the five more sets of staircases, and then trudged down three corridors before coming to the portrait of the Fat Lady. "Marmalade Crackers" she grumbled before going inside. 

As soon as she got inside she smiled. All of her friends were waiting for her with the exception of Luna of course. Ron and Ginny were battling with a game of Wizards Chess. Neville sat near and watched every move intently, trying to get pointers for when he played next, Hermione assumed. Hermione decided to plop down next to Neville and relaxed a moment before talking.

"Pansy wants to meet you tonight."

"Mmmmkay. Dang it Ginny!" Ginny giggled before smiling proudly.

"She said to meet at your normal place, whatever that means." Hermione stated, hoping to get some sort of reaction.

"Kay. Checkmate. Good game Ginny. I'll be back in a few hours. Bye." Ron left in a hurry, almost as if he wanted to go. But that couldn't be right could it? Not four months ago he hated the girl, and now he was practically sprinting in order to see him.

Hermione decided tonight would be a fine night to go talk to Draco. Maybe he knew why Ron was being so clingy…

An hour later 'Pansy' was walking into the Slytherin common room. She immediately caught sight of Draco, and sat eloquently next to him. He looked up for a brief moment and nodded his head as a sign of welcome.

They sat in a peaceful silence for a few moments. Occasionally Hermione (as Pansy of course) would look over at Draco and smile. "You know…. I think Ron's really fallen for me. Isn't it weird?" she asked quietly.

Draco looked at her skeptically before answering. "Well, I thought you loved him already so it didn't matter."

"Mmmn. I do, trust me I do. But sometimes it's hard to think that people as different as us can come to love each other, you know?"

"I guess. Hey anyways, I heard you and Weasel are going to be meeting after the ball Saturday night. By the Room of Requirement, is it true?"

"I guess so. Could you remind me again later? I'm kind of sleepy now." Hermione asked, fearing she would make Pansy miss a date that she couldn't exactly inform her about personally.

Draco looked at her oddly for a moment. "No, you know how much I hate nagging people to remember things. Write it in a notebook or something. I'm going to bed. Night Pansy." Draco got up and walked to the boy dorms, his robes billowing behind him in a sea of black. Hermione sighed helplessly before getting up to go to the second floor bathrooms.

How was she going to pull going to Pansy's date off?

**AN/ Gossssh! I'm so sorry this took so long. I've been having a lot of personal issues lately. And writing only caused more frustrations for me with all of the writer's block I've been having. This chapter probably stinks out loud because of it. Anyways, I will try writing the next chapter soon. It'll be shopping the ball! WOOOOO. I really didn't want to make a ball in this story. But I just couldn't help it. Oh well I guess. Review and tell me how much it sucked?**

**Also, I need someone to write a sex scene for me. I really can't bring myself to do it or I would on my own. Let me know if you're interested. You'll be completely credited Thanks!**** Tabby.**


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